Loss

When Gracie was at the school for blind kids, she had a classmate who also had significant medical needs in addition to being blind. I always felt extra-connected to her mom, because we both knew what it was to have a kid with multiple difficult needs. This kid had a brother, a beautiful little boy with no special needs and a radiant smile. On Friday the 13th, the mom was taking her two kids to the library when they were hit by a car. The little boy bore the brunt of the impact and suffered a skull fracture. He died Saturday (Valentine’s Day).

I’m shattered by the loss of this beautiful boy. What a precious child, what a sweet kid, what a perfect boy. Why, whywhywhy WHY, did this have to happen? And why did it have to be him? His parents must have wondered a thousand times if their daughter would make it through her medical issues; they probably never considered losing him. It’s heartbreaking. Tragic. TERRIBLE. I ache for them, knowing what I feel for his loss isn’t even a drop in their ocean of sadness.

At times like these, people offer all sorts of platitudes – “God needed another angel” – “His work here was done” – “God only gives us what we can handle” – but I’ll not say any of those terrible things to his parents. What kind of God would take a beautiful almost-4-year-old child? There weren’t any adult angels to take instead? And what parent could endure this loss? What a terrible, minimalistic thing to say to someone whose heart will never be whole again. I don’t know what I’ll say to her, this friend who has endured the worst possible thing in the history of endurance, but it won’t be any of those awful things.

Grace and I are going to pay our respects at his memorial this coming weekend. I am dreading seeing the two-faced discriminatory a-holes from Gracie’s old school, but that is nothing compared to the emotions T & H are suffering through. They deserve every respect and kindness at this terrible, terrible time. Prayers for them – prayers for love and light and peace from the agony of their loss.

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